I probably have to take a week to get settled into a new routine. And I'll be set to move forward, whichever route I should take next. :)
I feel different this time. It's difficult to explain. A bit more positive, stronger. I won't deny probably missing R while I'm away again but I probably won't want to dwell on it too much. I've been through it so many times before, I'm just going to have to go through it one more time. Even if I do start feeling the pinch, I'll only just need to deal with it and give myself some space. I'll miss him but I won't be hating life, if you get what I mean. Once I get used to the new routine of things, it shouldn't be so tough. I may just be too optimistic here but let's hope it brings me somewhere. :)
And frankly, I'm quite tired of people either overtly pitying my situation or belittling it. I guess I dislike hearing people commenting too much about my situation unless I asked for it. It's the plain idea that nobody else would understand anything else unless they're involved. And most times, there's really nothing 'wrong' at all yet certain people will keep insisting I have something bothering me and insist I open up to them about it. Haha. How about "you. you're the one bothering me right now."
I guess the bottom line is that I chose to be with this guy. I know what I'm in for. And I've been in this relationship for over three years now. I ought to know how to handle myself well enough. There's really no room for pity, no room for anything, except happiness and a bright future.
I'll be home in 4 days. Bye Europe, Hello Tropical Southeast Asia. And most importantly, hello Singapore, the city that never sleeps and never stops eating ;)
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